Fog - the 'Grey Flannel' of Weather

I’ve finally emerged from the two year fog I was in after my divorce with the express determination to Live Out Loud. Part of my new found clarity is that I must not keep my dreams and desires to myself; I’ve learned that what I think and feel is of value and expressing my hopes and dreams is good so that’s what I’m attempting to do here. I was standing in my tiny kitchen sipping coffee this morning and admiring the view of my apartment door (my kitchen doesn’t face a window) when I realized that the fog from heart-sickness is so insidious I didn’t even know I was in it until I came out of it. No, not a mental illness thing...I just lost my way for a few years. When it’s foggy (weather-wise) outside it feels like grey flannel on your skin, soft and warm and cuddly and people tend to get just a little more quiet-but the good kind-until the sun comes back out. But emotional fog is like grey wool – it heavily blankets the edges of your mind, scratching at your heart and leaving you with the ability to function but not really live. Maybe I should have taken Clary tea: first cousin to Clary Sage, it’s rejuvenating, balancing, inspiring and revitalizing to the spirit.

So – the fog has lifted, the sun is out, and I am a happy camper eagerly embracing my life and living it out loud. I’m excited about the promises and challenges of tomorrow’s unknowns. I laugh a lot now, I’m sharing things with my gal pals, making new friends, and am ready to enter the dating scene. Now that’s a scary thing – single at 52? It seems to me that the men my age are looking for a woman half their age. Oh, did you hear me just now? That sound was a cross between a snort and a sneer...not a very ladylike thing to do but then again, if I’m thinking it or feeling it I refuse to hide it. It’s part of living my life out loud. I’ve dated sporadically since the divorce but now I’m open to an actual relationship.

That’s about it for today. Let’s talk tomorrow!